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Aussies aren’t up for a shag? |

Now South Wales government ministor Grant McBride wants to ban a British entrepreneur from naming his beer Shag.

Sold internationally under the name Shag (after the bird, which features on the label!) and brewed in Holland the beer is the fourth that Mr McBride (a teetotaller and father-eight) has banned since becoming Gaming and Racing Minister in 2003 (others included Moo Joose and chocolate milkshake with vodka).

Mr McBride said:

To name the product Shag links it directly with sexual intercourse - and that’s not on.

It is irresponsible to link alcohol and sex so blatantly. I’m outraged by this product.”

The brewery said it was nothing more than “a storm in a glass of beer”.

Buggins says:
Eight kids? He can’t be offended by shagging! It’s a bit of fun, and the fact that adverisements feature a beer bottle on the backseat of a car with the catchphrase: “Fancy a Shag?” just adds to the fun!


Ghost Therapy |

Two nutters in India have been arrested after claiming that two ghosts helped them treat their patients.

Kohinoor Bibi and her husband Majid Mandal, would charge locals around £30 a time for treatments including gall stones, kidney stones, appendicitis, hernias and tumours.

Bibi informed the police that she only acted as a medium and it was the ghosts that treated patients. She went on to explain that what she earned she shared with the ghosts as they have families too!

Villagers grew unrestful at news of the arrest and demanded their release, they were release only after assuring the police they wouldn’t practice the therapy?

Buggins Says:
Who arrested the ghosts? Did someone call GhostBusters? No! I thought not, so the ghosts were still free to go around treating people! That’s the thing, were the villagers getting freebies from the ghosts while the couple were banged up?

All those requiring Buggins therapy with a large wooden stick - step forward!


A Time and a Place? |

We’ve all had to refrain from using our mobiles whilst driving, but what did I witness yesterday??

Some idiot on a moped, scooting past me as I sat at lights waiting to turn onto a major A road. What was he doing to be branded an idiot I hear you ask?

Not only was the foolish young man wearing Shorts and T-Shirt, but he had his hand in his pocket!!!! On a moped!!!!

Buggins says:
There’s a time and a place for pocket billiards! 40mph on an A road, whilst driving a moped is neither the time nor the place!


Sleepwalker fell off roof |

Story

Some foolish German fell off a roof sleepwalking - claiming he lost his balance because he woke up!

Buggins says:
Now we know how they get downstairs before us with the towels on the sunbeds - don’t we children? The answer to our problems - see a German - Poke the bugger and wake him up!!

Our friendly german had climbed out of a first-floor window, shimmied up a drainpipe and walked across the roof before falling 20 feet to the ground.

He fell onto a soggy lawn, saving his life - but I’ll bet it wasn’t soggy lawns he was dreaming about!!! He’s got a few broken bones, obviously nothing more than he deserves!


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May 2012
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